The Quick Thinker

By Jim Hagarty

I have a good brain, but to be honest, I am not as quick on my feet as some other people are.

Such as the young man who was found naked and causing a bit of a stir in a carpark in England. Realizing the cops had been called, the fast-thinking guy needed a place to hide the seven grams of cocaine he was carrying. So, being ever resourceful, he tucked away all his goodies under his foreskin. Had I been in this situation, I am not sure this hiding spot would have occurred to me, but now that I know …

After a fight with the police, the man was arrested and taken to hospital. The prosecutor, whose last name is Ballinger, of course, described in court how the drugs slowly emerged from the young man’s genitals after his arrest.

The defence attorney, who last name is, of course, Redhead, tried but failed to keep his client out of jail where he will contemplate the wages of sin for a few weeks.

Author: Jim Hagarty

I am a 72-year-old retired journalist, busy recovering from a lifelong career as an unretired journalist. This year marks a half century of my scratching out little fables about life. My interests include genealogy, humour and music. I live in a little blue shack in Canada and spend most of my time trying to stay out of trouble. I am not that good at it. I also spent years teaching journalism. Poor state of journalism today: My fault. I have a family I don't deserve, a dog that adores me, and two cars the junk yard refuses to accept. My prized possessions include my old guitar and a razor my Dad gave me when I was 14 and which I still use when I bother to shave. Oh, and my great-great-grandfather's blackthorn stick he brought from Ireland in the 1850s. I have only one opinion but it is a good one: People take too many showers.