In spite of what my wife tells everyone every day, I am not a perfect person. When our kids were small, I used to hide the best cookies from them so I could eat them myself after they were in bed. And then there were many other sins, such as … Oh, wait a minute, that was the only crime I have ever committed. One time I did check out the two pillows on our bed and gave my spouse the flatter one, but what self-respecting husband hasn’t done that?
But whether I’m a good guy or not, here is something I have never done in my 68 years. I have never tried to crawl through the doggy door of a stranger’s home. Not sure why I never have done that. I guess the opportunity never came up. Not saying I would never do that.
And yet, this is exactly what a pitcher for the San Diego Padres was recently arrested for. He was taken to jail, charged and released on a $100 bond. Reading that, I am glad that I was not in his situation because I would not be able to afford to pay the bond.
The police description of the incident is enough to raise the hair on your head, which makes me grateful not to have any. Shortly before 4 a.m. on Sunday, the pitcher started crawling through the doggy door. He did not receive a great greeting. The homeowner kicked him in the face after which, another baseball player pulled the pitcher out of the door. But before they could get away, the homeowner reached through the doggy door and shocked the pitcher in the back with a stun gun.
The pitcher explained to police that he thought he was at his own home even though none of his entrances have doggy doors. The charging documents state that the pitcher was “not considered to be sober” at the time of the incident.
Man, I am glad I am not a sinner!
©2019 Jim Hagarty
